By Tahlia Mandie, Direction Exploring    Starting back at school can be a challenging time, for parents and kids. It can be a tough time especially for kids that are starting school for the first time. While it is an exciting time for both, it can also be a time that is filled with a variety of feelings, emotions and challenges including anxiety, fear, guilt and uncertainty.

However with the right preparation, your child can feel confident, ready and excited about returning or starting school.

It is important to prepare ahead of time and prepare a couple of weeks before school begins. ‘When situations are thought through, discussed, and planned for, there tends to be less anxiety generated and a greater likelihood for success’ (Kanner, 2009). American Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychologist, Dr Keith Kanner (2009), discussed that young children have limited ability to think abstractly and thus need assistance and encouragement in understanding what is expected of them and how to reach their goals. 

In preparing for the return of school, parents need to sit down with their kids and discuss the topic of “returning to school”. Many may believe that this is a taboo topic and should not be discussed because conflict and bad moods may arise. On the contrary, if you avoid this topic, kids may experience greater anxiety shortly after school has begun because they have not been prepared emotionally for this transition.

With any transition, kids need repeated reassurance, encouragement and support to help them understand the change and their feelings associated with the change. Self-esteem is generated when a child experiences confidence and self-worth. If a child is given encouragement and reassurance in their strengths and abilities, their confidence will grow and thus their self-esteem.

For high school students, discussions on success and goal setting are important. Parents should inquire with them how they plan to study, what they want to achieve during the year, how well they want to do, and what goals they will like to set for themselves. These discussions will make them feel supported and confident in their intellect and give them a sense of direction and purpose in their study’s and themselves. If they know what they are working towards they will achieve greater success. You may also want to take the opportunity to sit with your son or daughter and write down short-term and long-term goals.

Other Transition Tips

• Get excited with your child – Start talking about how great school will be; what they might learn; new friends they will meet. If you generate an excited and enthusiastic energy, your son or daughter will do as well.
• Take them shopping for their new school items – let them pick their books, pens, and other stationary. If there is a choice, let them choose their school shoe and clothes. This gives them sense of ownership and something else to look forward to, using and wearing their new things.
• Discuss and plan the school routine – including when to wake up, brush teeth, have breakfast, and any afternoon activities. If needed, create a “Daily Schedule” chart. As discussed above, this is more preparation in order to reduce their anxiety about the transition and prepares them for what is ahead.
• Organise a play date with some kids that you know will be in their class.
• For high school students, encourage them to get organised early, and begin talking goals.

Other useful sites:
Kids Health
Reach Out

References:
Kanner, K., 2009. Your Family matters. Article obtained from Your Family Matters

Image: freedigitalphotos.net

About the author:

Tahlia Mandie is a psychotherapist, family counsellor and mum who runs her own private practice, Direction Exploring and now runs her own blog, The Parenting Files - because families matter. Discussing all things parenting and family matters to the serious stuff to the not so serious stuff, the parenting files is spoken with a little witt, quirk and humour. Tahlia also writes regular columns and articles for magazines, newspapers and other online forums.

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